Things Gnomes are good for:

Mages:  Gnomes and Mages are a natural combination.  They hope to overcome their enemies through the combination of ‘small and useless appearance’ and ‘small and useless abilities’.  Unfortunately, since these things are actually true, rather than mere perception, they generally fail.

Footstools: It’s been a hard day’s raiding.  You’ve spent the morning in the Auction House, the evening killing Arthas, and your poor tired feet are killing you ‘(blast those stylish yet uncomfortable boots!)  Find the nearest inn, snaffle a frosty glass of the finest ale, then grab the nearest Gnome by the scruff of the neck (or pigtails!) and stuff em under your feet.  Cushy footrest bliss.  Mmmmm



Balloons:  You know the scene in Shrek, right?  Where they blow up frogs and turn them into balloons?  I think Gnomes would look adorable if we did the same thing to them!

Punting: Duh.

What else do you think Gnomes are useful for?

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7 Responses to “On Gnomes”
  1. apparently gnomes are for killing other locks…….

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  2. You forgot:
    - kicking them out of the passenger seat of your rocket while high in the air
    - standing next to large pets for amusing size comparison
    - invading Horde cities en masse
    - miniature corpse graffiti

    And for your first comment about gnome mages – I challenge you to a duel! If I win, you post a retraction. Name your prize if you win.

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  3. Oh no, I do believe I have put my foot in my mouth (seeing as I have probably the world’s most pitiful dueling skills). I shall have to ponder this prize that I have no chance of winning.

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  4. Hmm, to be honest I have never thought about gnomes having a “use”.

    Interesting question and I must admit you have me rather stumped.

    Giving murlocs some friends to play with?
    Oombulance´s last blog post ..Lazy Mode Bear Tanking Proper druid Gold update

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  5. Gnomes are wonderful…

    With tartar sauce. They also make a great roast! (Don’t try to stew them, though, they are too squishy. Tough Dwarf meat makes for better long-cooking dishes like soups and stews.)

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  6. lol seems my work has already been done.

    Gnome are more like Diamonds… They are beautiful as they are, no purpose is required for their existence, however as beautiful as we may be, you will find that we are the hardest substance on Azeroth and can cut through Demon Armor like a hot knife through butter.

    Twirl us by our pigtails, punt us to the far reaches of Azeroth… but just one tip…

    Don’t ever sleep again, because we will find you.

    It wont be the Boggy man under your bed, it wont be muggers is dark alleys…

    One day that footstool will remove your toes before you have time to put your cocktail down.

    One day we will find you, and when we do, we will slice, dice and roast you.

    Most likely at that point we will feed you to our novelty pet, which while it may be larger than us, treats us with sensible respect.
    Gnomeaggedon´s last blog post ..There is no “I” in “PvP”

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  7. Weatherlight - Runetotem EU says:

    Good for Dual-Wielding… On a Stick?

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