This week’s Blog Azeroth Shared Topic is all about the total ‘tards that surround us every day in game.  Since Gnomer managed to suggest something that I am totally in sync with (‘tarding it up is my specialty!), I decided that I would have a shot at writing about this one.

So, what is a locktard?

Thankfully, they are a very rare creature which can not be often spotted out and about in Azeroth.  Key tips to finding this rare and fascinating creature include keeping an eye open for:

  • The lock who soulstones themselves in parties instead of someone who can rez
  • The lock who takes the Mp5 gear, because ‘it’s shiny and I hate lifetapping’
  • The lock who spams Searing Pain, because they talented into it
  • The lock who talented into Searing Pain because it was there
  • The lock who uses their Voidwalker to DPS
  • The lock who melees when they go OOM
  • The lock who can’t chain seduce effectively
  • The lock who fears a mob into other packs of mobs in instances
  • The lock who life taps themselves half to death and then stands IN THE VOID ZONE

No doubt there are other characteristics of locktards out there. While I don’t spot too many locktards, they are out there, and they should be stopped.  However, I am sure that there is a little locktard in all of us. Honestly, I have done half these things myself… oh no, I am secretly a locktard?

/identity crisis

11 Responses to “Did you Just Spot That Locktard?”
  1. Are LockTards also NocTards, being the masters and mistresses of the dark?

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  2. [...] Myself at Destructive Reach with ‘Did You Just Spot that Locktard?’ [...]

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  3. Nothing wrong with soulstoning yourself. Can’t dps whilst dead and meters are everything to a locktard :p
    Just hit 80 on my lock and I suspect I’m going to be committing every crime in the book on my first warlocky trip to Naxx tonight.

    Perhaps sneaking in a rebanish even though everything else is already dead so you can lifetaps/finish your cookie without losing place on the dps meter is also a sign of a locktard.

    Or people who have their pets on aggressive in neutral towns. Or having your pet on aggressive fullstop.

    Erinyss last blog post..This sounds so horribly ungrateful but

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  4. High-level Affliction Warlocks soloing with Voidwalker.

    *cry*

    Samodeans last blog post..Links! 5/29

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  5. You forgot the section:

    “What to do when you spot a LockTard”.

    Two words….

    Kill it!

    Gnomeaggedons last blog post..Mr Offspec

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  6. *sheepishly raises hand.

    I was very distraught about my dps in a VoA run the other day. Was not until the 5th time I went back to WWS to check what the hell I was doing that I realised I had no pet. Hmm Demo lock – pet = failock

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  7. [...] (or after) you read my list, I think it’d be wise to also check out Saresa’s list over at Destructive Reach.  I tried not to duplicate items she had in an effort to expand upon the [...]

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  8. [...] your friendly neighborhood locktard, [...]

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  9. [...] Saresa (from the very entertaining Destructive Reach)  on Locktards.  I, of course, have never done any of those [...]

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  10. Thank you for an excellent post!
    Gotta add one though.
    “a lock who persists with always doing Seed of Corruption on all packs in an instance – even when there are only 2 of them.”

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  11. Hehehe…. I have a bad habit of using Rain of Fire after most of the mobs are dead. Yay for not paying attention on trash!

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